hrf incorporated
Harold R. Fann, CEO

Copy editing

HRF home
Newsletters
Website design & maintenance
CD inserts & labels
Layout and Design
Proofreading
Publications
Copy Editing
About Us
Portfolio
Clients
 

Copy editing - what it is, why it's important

Here are before and after excerpts from one of HRF Inc.'s copy editing projects, showing the difference between the original copy provided to us, and the version which has been copy edited.


Copy editing takes writing which is "good," and transforms it into writing which is "compelling." The article at left would interest only those who were technically minded, dedicated enough to wade through the jargon. The article on the right, however, without crippling the facts or the essence, is readable for someone who doesn't have the tenacity to pore through medical journals. This rewrite would be interesting and understandable to anyone with a general knowledge of vitamins, herbs, and minerals; it spells out the problems and solutions in a bite-sized format, easy to swallow, easy to digest.
 
BEFORE:

Prescription for
Flagging Energy

2nd draft Hart - Feb. 16

If you have days when you just sag and drag--or if the evenings find you too tired to do anything but slump in front of the TV--there are healthy strategies you can apply to boost your energy level.

L-carnitine. Carnitine is needed by heart and skeletal muscle to burn fatty acids, their major source of energy. L-carnitine supplements have been shown to benefit people with anorexia, chronic fatigue and some forms of heart disease. Carnitine supplementation is thought to improve exercise capability in healthy individuals through more efficient fatty acid metabolism in muscles, more efficient glucose utilization, enhanced response to training, and delayed muscle fatigue.

Coenzyme Q10 (CoQ10). Also known as ubiquinone, CoQ10 is a "team player" with multiple effects, including antioxidant properties. Its distribution in the body suggests a significant role in energy production. Specifically, it is involved in several energy transfer steps in the production of adenosine triphosphate (ATP), the fuel all cells need in order to do their work. Several studies have shown objective and subjective improvements in athletic performance. Synthesis of CoQ10 in the liver requires at least eight vitamins and several trace elements, so a deficiency in any one of these micronutrients could result in CoQ10 deficiency. The statin drugs widely used to treat high cholesterol levels interfere with synthesis of CoQ10 in the liver. CoQ10 supplements may be needed to resolve complaints of fatigue or sore muscles associated with statin drugs.

Panax ginseng. Ginseng's active compounds (saponins) are classified as "adaptogens" for their apparent ability to increase resistance to stressors such as exercise or temperature extremes. Ginseng has been shown to improve endurance in many studies involving animals and in some trials involving well-conditioned athletes. It is thought that ginseng might have more pronounced effects in healthy non-athletes, but so far the scientific evidence is incomplete.

Don't forget the fuel. If you are trying to lose weight, be aware that cutting calories too drastically or skipping meals will lower your blood sugar, resulting in fatigue and (if prolonged) irritability, dizziness, tremor, cold sweating, and headache. Complex carbohydrates avoid the insulin surge that follows consumption of refined flour and sugar and so are an excellent slow-burning fuel.

The exercise paradox. So long as you don't overdo it, exercise tends to be energizing, not fatiguing. The physiological effects of exercise--a quickened heart rate, improved blood flow, and epinephrine (adrenaline) release--all counteract fatigue.

Limit caffeine intake. Studies have shown that a dose of caffeine before an athletic event can improve endurance. However, the body readily becomes habituated to daily caffeine, so that larger doses are needed to produce an effect. Once the habit is formed, caffeine withdrawal tends to be punished by fatigue and a pounding headache. If you find it too hard to shake the caffeine habit, green tea contains caffeine as well as cancer-fighting polyphenols.

Take care of yourself. When choosing energy-boosting supplements, avoid those containing ephedra or ma juang. Ten deaths have been linked to weight loss products or energy boosters containing ephedra, as well as serious side effects such as high blood pressure, palpitations, stroke and seizures. Finally, unexplained fatigue or weakness could be due to an underlying illness, so see your doctor if these symptoms persist.

References . . .

AFTER:

2nd draft Hart
Rewrite - HRF inc.

Stop feeling exhausted!
5 best ways to boost your energy levels

When you're sagging, and you feel too tired to do anything but collapse on the sofa, getting up for a quick walk around the block is hardly the cure that comes to mind - even though moderate exercise, on a regular basis, will probably do more to invigorate the body than anything else you can do.

But, if you start taking walks and still find yourself constantly tired, your diet is the next place to look for culprits.

Look at your food intake. If your diet is rich in simple carbohydrates (sugar, starchy foods), or if you're on a "starvation" cycle (skipping meals, then making up for the skipped meal with pastries or by overeating), chances are you've been putting your body into a tailspin of high and low blood sugar levels. As your body swings to the lower sugar level, you can experience fatigue, then irritability, dizziness - even cold sweating and headaches.1 Just a small change - to more complex carbohydrates and more regular meals - can have a lasting impact on your energy level.2

Caffeine intake - from coffee, tea, soft drinks, and even chocolate - is a double-edged sword. If you're not a regular user, a small dose of caffeine can give you a quick energy boost. But the body gets addicted to caffeine quickly, requiring larger doses to produce an effect. Then withdrawal can produce (surprise!) serious fatigue, not to mention a pounding headache. If you can't eliminate caffeine from your diet, at least try to reduce your intake. A switch to green tea can help: it contains lower levels of caffeine as well as cancer-fighting polyphenols.2

Here are some strong energizers you can add to your diet, which lack caffeine's side effects:

L-carnitine and CoQ10 (ubiquinone). Convincing studies have shown that L-carnitine supplements can benefit people with chronic fatigue, anorexia, and some forms of heart disease.3-5 Why? Heart and skeletal muscle burn fatty acids as their primary source of energy, and carnitine is an essential part of this process. In one study, patients with severe cardiac insufficiency showed a dramatic increase in bicycle ergometer performance after prolonged use of L-carnitine.5

CoQ10 works especially well when taken with L-carnitine, since it, too, plays a critical role in the body's energy use and production. CoQ10 is ubiquitous. It is used throughout the body (hence its name, "ubiquinone"), has multiple effects (including antioxidant properties), and plays a vital role in the production of ATP (adenosine triphosphate), which is the fuel for your cells.2 You cannot produce any energy for your cells without it. Since CoQ10 synthesis in the liver requires at least eight vitamins and several trace elements,6 and since aging, stress, exercise, poor nutrition and many medications2 inhibit CoQ10 production, our bodies simply cannot produce enough of this quasi-vitamin. The statin drugs - widely used to treat high cholesterol levels - also interfere with CoQ10 synthesis.

Ginseng. Wars were fought over this herb - it is that important. Ginseng's active compounds (saponins) are called "adaptogens," because they help your body adapt to stress. And by stress, we're also talking about exercise and temperature extremes.7 Ginseng has been shown to improve endurance in many studies involving animals and in trials involving well-conditioned athletes. But the effects may be even more pronounced for healthy non-athletes!8, 9 Panax ginseng is more cooling (according to Chinese medicine), while the American variety produces more heat.

Take care of yourself. When choosing energy-boosting supplements, avoid those containing ephedra or ma juang. Ten deaths have been linked to weight loss products or energy boosters containing ephedra, as well as serious side effects such as high blood pressure, palpitations, stroke and seizures.10

Recommendations:

  1. Start any daily exercise program you can manage - even if it's just parking your car at the back of the lot and walking five minutes to your job, the grocery store and the post office.
  2. Cut out one serving a day of sweets or bread/pasta and replace it with vegetables, fruits, or a fish protein (tuna's fine).
  3. Add xxx mg. of L-carnitine and xxx mg. of CoQ10 to your daily intake. You can find them at your local health food store.
  4. For an occasional boost (but not for 365 days a year consumption) take xxx mg. of ginseng per day. It also can be found at your local health food store.
  5. Finally, unexplained fatigue or weakness could be due to an underlying illness, so please see your doctor if these symptoms persist.

References . . .

TO TOP OF PAGE

Try out Third Sphere Hosting!
© 2003-2007 HRF Incorporated. All Rights Reserved.
Home - Newsletters - Web Design & Maintenance - Web e-commerce - CD Inserts & Labels - Layout & Design - Copy Editing
Publications - About Us - Portfolio - Clients